Ready, Set, Blog!

I thought I’d welcome you all to my blog with a brief introduction as to who I am and what my purpose for writing this blog is.
I am about three quarters Spanish and a quarter French and have grown up in England all my life. This has resulted in the fact that I don’t look like I’m from anywhere. Often people have said, “Ohh…you’re Spanish” with an unwritten, nearly silent question mark hovering somewhere between them thinking I’m making it up and them wondering if their stereotype of what a Spaniard ought to look like is outdated. The stereotype, in case you didn’t know, goes a little something like this: gorgeous huge eyes with luscious long eyelashes, olive skin, dark brown wavy hair with golden reflections and a sexy English accent with mistakes that brand one funny and cute. Instead, I am the palest Mediterranean person you will ever meet, and if we don’t, take my word for it. My eyes are honey colour – no complaints there – the long thick eyelashes? Non-existent. Everyday I bless the man that invented mascara, without it I would look like I had two peeled eyeballs. My hair is dark brown in the winter and a lighter more confused shade in the hotter seasons and my accent used to be clipped British, but somewhere between 15 and 21 it adopted an American twang. The grammatical mistakes I make are those fit for the stereotypical blonde and as for the French part of my heritage…we’re still working on it, oui?
To make matters better regarding my not looking like I’m from any particular country, I also don’t look like I belong to my family. All the women in my family are fairly short, blonde, petite, huge chests, blue/green eyes and sport accentuated cheekbones. I, in turn, have come out twice as tall as them all, with the shoulder span of an athlete, hands as big as the average person’s big face, curly frizzy hair verging on untamable afro, cheeks mirroring those of a chipmunk when made to smile and with feet big enough to warrant the saying: “You know what they say about big feet?!” “Huuuuuuuge socks and the inability to ever find any fetching lady like shoes.” It’s Birkenstock sandals and wooly socks for me. So due to my appearance being nothing like my family’s and not having any siblings to compare myself to, I have spent a great deal of my life asking my mother whether I was adopted. The poor woman has one very big child, gives birth naturally and then has to spend close to 20 years assuring the kid it wasn’t bought in some big shopping centre whilst she also deals with having to shed the baby weight. I even asked my granny once if by simply looking at me where would she say I was from – she thought about it for a whole 30 seconds and said “nowhere.” There’s nothing like a little white lie, is there?
Now, I wouldn’t say I have had a particularly easy life, but then, what is easy? But one thing I have constantly been surrounded by is humour. I have grown to realize that humour cures nearly all. Don’t get me wrong, I am not talking about humour curing hunger pangs. There is nothing funny from being served a ‘Knock, knock’ joke instead of a steak. I am referring to all the terribly awful things that occur in life, ranging from the economic crisis we are surrounded by, a balloon popping and we all drop to the floor crying BOMB! The daily worries one may incur due to the life we lead, the world we inhabit and what we have gradually turned the world we inhabit into. I am talking about all the very serious things we live with day by day and end up taking up so much space in our minds that we forget how to laugh and be carefree. One of the most important things in life is to try and be happy doing whatever we do. And by this, I mean trying to make good of any situation. Laughing, giggling, eye rolling, deep breathing, chocolate – it’s all good! It offers a solution, a lantern to appear in our tunnel and makes life a lot more bearable.
Thus, my blog has been born from people commenting on how entertaining the spin I put on life is. I will be blogging about popular news, your life, my life and anything else that seems to be particularly interesting. In order to write about your life, send me e-mails or comments about things you’d like to see woven into a humorous tail.
There will be blogs at the beginning of the week to give you all an ‘umph’ and then at the end to prepare you for a great weekend.